Well kiddies, what did we learn from the President’s speech?
Democrats don’t just hate Americans. They hate everybody. They hate Iraqis so much that they don’t even believe they might want a better life – even if they need help to achieve it. Maybe I should be a Democrat again.
There is no “magic bullet” to win the war. Gee, imagine that. War might be awfully difficult, not clear-cut and requiring constant revision and reorganization to fight. What was that about plans and enemies?
Looky here, in three weeks we conquered a country the size of California. For three years we’ve occupied said country with fewer deaths than both armies combined suffered in twenty-four hours on the banks of Antietam Creek. Is that not a staggering accomplishment? We can’t acknowledge how stupefying our achievement has been? What a tiny-minded, lazy, jaded, unworthy people we are.
The whole thing is very simple. What better place to have an army than Iraq? Look at a map sometime. Look where Iraq is. Now then, consider two points: there is nothing more essential to the world’s economy at present than oil and there is no place on Earth with more loopy banana-brains than the Middle East. Tell me why, again, we shouldn’t have 150,000 fighting men right smack in the center of the nest of vipers? It’s a beach-head, kids, just a beach-head.
It would be loverly if the Iraqi nation pulled its head out of the sand and really became a sane and self-governing society. I have no doubt that many, even most, of the Iraqi people would like to see that happen. But it doesn’t really matter. Democracy seems to have to come from within. It has been well demonstrated that democracy requires a certain amount of wealth and safety to properly establish itself. Maybe the Middle East is, as yet, incapable of democracy, lacking the Judeo-Christian and Western traditions necessary to establish it. Maybe enlightened dictatorship is the best anyone can hope for at the present time.
But for us to have armed men, tanks, planes and very large, very nasty things that go boom sitting in the desert between Iran and Syria and sidled up to Saudi Arabia is the best possible scenario. It’s something like this, “We’re cool. We’ll all sit around and get delightful tans. But if you make us pay attention to you and we lose the nice all-over bronzing because only our head and shoulders are above the armor plating, you’ll be sorry.” This is a good thing. This is a necessary thing. And I am still damned glad we’ve done it.
Good luck to the Iraqis. Good luck to the American soldier. It is a great and worthy thing we have done, a righteous attempt to spread peace and liberty in accordance with our own self-interest. If it doesn’t work – well, I reckon we just keep some of the land we’ve conquered and set up shop to make sure everyone keeps their eyes well focused on our local presence rather than letting them wander abroad for targets of opportunity.