A Voter’s Guide: 2004

Mallard Fillmore today announced his “Don’t Vote if you don’t know anything” PSA. That’s a fine idea. I’d like to add my voice to the chorus begging the ignorant to avoid the polls this year. The Republic can survive wars, rebellion, treachery, legislative gridlock, recessions, depressions, and any other bad thing that can be thrown at it but it can not survive an uneducated electorate.

So, do us all a favor this year and DON’T VOTE if you:

  • Believe the Republic is one step from Nazi Germany or Soviet Russia.
  • Believe in the depths of your heart that Conservatives are evil fascists or Liberals are stupid commies.
  • Believe that the President is a moron or the Senator doesn’t believe in anything.
  • Believe that war is never the answer or that war is always the answer.
  • Believe that gay marriage is a civil rights issue or that homosexuality will be the undoing of us all.
  • Believe that it may be neccessary “. . . to take things away from you on behalf of the common good;” or that entirely freeing the engines of commerce from taxation is good policy.
  • Believe that if Kerry wins we’re all doomed or that if Bush wins we’re all doomed.

If, in your heart of hearts, you have ever put stock in any of the above statements – for the love of all that is good and holy, abstain from voting this year. You are entirely too ignorant to govern yourself let alone have any voice in the governing of the common weal.

This is an important election. I happen to think our future rests upon the outcome; but I also know that regardless of the outcome, balance will return at some point in the future. We may have to lose tens of thousands of people, hundreds of millions of dollars and decades or centuries of political evolution but things always find a way to rebalance.

It would be nice, though, if we could make the right choice now and save ourselves lots of stuff and bother.

I’ll be voting for the President because he’s the only choice this year, because he’s the best man for the job and because I believe the march of freedom can not be helped along by appealing to the policy of the mythic past.

To move ahead you need to think ahead.

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4 Responses to A Voter’s Guide: 2004

  1. bampf says:

    Hey, where are polls in gburg now? I m still registered in Adams County and figure I may actually make the drive to cast my singular voice against that droopy eyed monkey (and it would be a vote against rather than a vote for).

    In any case, I know the restaurant where I voted in 92 and 96 has changed hands/names a couple of times since then so I m not sure where to go. Little help?

    And do voter registrations expire… 96 was my last use of my card… don t wanna make the trip if I ll be barred entrance. I m relying on you to be the informed type so I can quickly return to ignorant bliss by late Tuesday night.


  2. Chad says:

    I believe if you haven’t voted in 4 years (ie, you skip 4 straight years), that you need to re-register. At least, that’s how it was in Jersey (I voted in 1992 and then not again until 1998 — and I had to re-register to do it).

  3. bp says:

    I don’t think you ever actually get un-registered but you can get marked inactive and potentially even be removed from the rolls. If that happens, you vote with a Provisional Ballot – a new thing for 2004 – and they’ll confirm your eligibility and count your vote later in the week.

    Bampf, apparently you can tell them at the polling place to change your address for the next time around.

    Here’s the skinny on PA voting; your experience may vary:


  4. bampf says:

    Hm. Well, I m making the drive and I ll see what happens. If not fulfulling my civic duty, a bowl of King’s Crock will be my just deserts.